Clueuin's Art and Poetry Corner

I've Seen

2011-06-07T11:56:00.001-07:00

I wrote this poem inspired by a walk on the streets at three in the morning. I started thinking about the things I’ve seen in the long years of my life. (Heh, heh, you didn’t think I’d give you clues on exactly how old I was did you?). Some of it didn’t actually happen to me or even in my neighborhood. Some did but they all come together in a gigantic caliscope of memories. Some I have seen on television on the news about things that have happen in or around my area in Brooklyn. Then there are the street people I’ve observed in my neighborhood. There is this store I go to for ‘loosies’, cigarettes I buy and there are some people there who let’s just say their store is a hang out for ‘Charecters’ and just leave it at that. But what I’ve seen that is bad isn’t all bad and what I’ve seen is good but is all subjective. Depends on how you look at things. What have you seen? Do you see hope for change? I do. Enjoy this poem and look for hope. M.A.R

I’ve Seen

(A Poem)

By M R

A Prayer or maybe a Psalm.

Young rouges, Roughnecks, Middle-aged Hustlers.

One after another, sitting at one table.

One dreams, one schemes, one stays on top.

Some are grizzly old bears, some are just fops.

Lower down pants, showing off the muscle, do-rags.

Wife beaters, staying on top.

All are wannabees, never do they last, one down,

One upmanship, having the last laugh.

One sees them all come down the pike, livin’ in

the ‘hood. Think you’ve seen them all, if only

you could.

I’ve seen bell bottom hustlers, guys with ‘fros.

A city on fire, glass Molotov cocktails thrown. All on

T.V, some in front of my eyes, tough guys,

losers, all in my sight.

Guys with knives out, brass knuckles on their fist.

Gold chain wearing guys, you can not miss.

Kangol wearing, cocky motherfuckers. Class

Clown cut ups, cutting all the classes.

Corner store hanging, smoking all the weed,

Forty drinking, sitting on their asses.

Scheming, big dreams, livin’ in the ashes.

Threatening old ladies, some are living scum.

Leaving their old ladies with all the babies.

Baby mama drama, who’s your man?

Protesting Grandma’s, doing what they

can. Going to church expecting the worse.

Bedstuy do or die. Drive by shoot outs.

Young men dying. Cooking the books,

Cooking the crack. Dividing the territory,

lying on their backs. Plotting, planning,

All have come to naught.

Then came nineties, and wasn’t that grand?

Young men came to earth, needing a new

plan. Charities gave a damn, programs came.

Still the hustlers still stayed the same.

City on fire, do you hear our prayers?

Street corner preachers, do you really

Care? One day it will all burn. Can you

Find a plan?

I’ve seen it all and seen it past. Good

Things are coming back to back. A black

man is President. A lie is understood.

Things are changing down in the hood.

I see a city on fire and ashes on the street

with a Phoenix rising in the air screaming

To the beat. Hustlers, wise men, little babies

growing, young men, vibes felt. A city in

the morning.

A new dawn is breaking. Bums have a care!

Roughnecks, Young rouges, bow your head

In prayer. For one day you shall see…..

..A Young Phoenix in the air.

The Calm Before The Storm

2011-02-25T20:38:00.000-08:00

The Calm Before The Storm
By M.R

It's the peace before there is war.
It's the quiet before there is noise.
it's the feeling you feel before the shoe
drop, before the bough breaks, before all
the kings horses come.

The calm before the storm.

It's the moment before the sea change
and the mood shifts.
It can be seconds, minutes, or days
before the storm.
One should really strive to enjoy.....

The calm before the storm.

If only my tears I cry were diamonds.

2010-06-28T10:25:00.000-07:00

If only my tears I cry were diamonds.
By M.A.R A.K.A MRClueuin

It's useless you know,
to cry. To sob, to go
into hysterics.

Oh, yes it's cathartic.
It calms the nerves.
Gentles the fragile
soul. But for all
and all completely
useless.

I've sobbed, cried, moaned.
Curled up in a ball, lying on my
bed, or soaking in a tub.

Still, totally useless.

It doesn't pay my bills,
get the rent out on time,
it doesn't even stop or
change time.

Oh, if only my tears I cry were
diamonds.
If only they were worth their
weight in gold.
If the price of dying a little inside
was worth the price!
I could pay off my sorrow in millions.

I could cry away worry about tomorrow.
Buy a minute or two of peace and relief.
Make my friends happy and my enemies
Nash their teeth in jealousy.

But I cry my tears and my sorrow is
still holding on with it's teeth.
Like a rabid dog it doesn't know
better. That it's acting like my
worse enemy.

If only my tears I cry were diamonds.

Wow, yeah! Your probably wondering what bought that on. Well my Dad, Charles R.,is dying. Due to some complications with his over all health. He's got Senior Dementia, can't swallow, and now he has pneumonia. This and add up other things that are going on with my life and you can see how hard it is to remain my sharp and chipper self. To all others who don't know what I'm feeling, I wish I could apologize for being such a downer but it's not going to happen, sorry that's just the way I feel right now. Peace.

Screaming With The Mute Button on.

2010-06-28T10:06:00.000-07:00

Screaming With The Mute Button On.
By M.A.R A.K.A MRClueuin

I wrote this piece when I was having a feeling of hopelessness during my ongoing job search. There were and are some other ongoing issues going on with my life currently, more about that later, so I just thought it would somehow appropriate that I present this poem here now. I'm sure that I'm not the only one who feels this way. That is why I originally presented this poem to my fellow posters at Indeed.Com a month ago. There are a lot of people with a lot going on right now. Everything from facing foreclosure to finding that job to pay the rent and or mortgage, Utility bills, and Medical bills. This poem is for me and others like me.

What I gain I lose. What I hope for is gone.
When you look at me, you don't see what goes on.

You might think you know, what is the best thing to do but
till you really know you don't have a clue.

I try to keep my head up but failure keeps me down.
I try to stick my chin out but inside it's on the ground.

I try to put in place a face, a look called normalcy but inside I feel like a wreak. No one can feel my misery.

I'm screaming with the Mute button on but it's not on my face.
No one can tell that bad times have put me in my place.

When I was young I thought I had enough to put me on the top.
I'm decades older now, the top I never got.
My rent is due, my job is gone, and if you ever knew, the times I wish it all would stop you'd race to call a doc.

When asked; 'How are you?, I lie and say I'm Fine.
Although in my reality 'FINE' is Freaked out, Insensible, Neurotic, and Emotional.
What can I say, what can I do?
I go on for another day. Though I'm......

Screaming with the Mute Button on.
I'm afraid I'm back to square one.
I start again but oh my friend(s)
I'm afraid the screamings just begun.

Facebook $1499 a month! Oh hell no! My comment to Facebook. Why?!

2010-01-18T10:36:00.000-08:00

Why Facebook? Why? I feel as if I have been stabbed in the back. I really love this internet company. When I found out what they are planning I practically went into shock. I was too tired last night to respond so this morning I wrote a comment letter to them this morning. Here it is.
( I know I only have one follower so if he is reading this I hope he shares this information.)
Here it is for what it's worth:

I don't know if this is really a 'General question or comment' situation however it seems to me that the the person and persons who run Facebook have lost their minds!
You have a mult-billion dollar company, you are number 1 in networking services, and billions of people around the world use your services. Yet for some reason you gentleman, (and for all I know ladies), think that you need to make more money off of the the consumers of your product.
Now what I want to know is why do you think that and how do you think that your consumers in these tough economic times that 'we' can afford $ 14.99 a month?
I myself pay 62.69 dollars a month for internet services and that's because I have just gotten a job. Before that I have been going to public and college libararies to surf the net. I have been pleased; (do you hear me?), please with your FREE services. Don't think however that I haven't noticed the commericial ads, the games that ask for me to buy tokens, and the applications that have commercials. Oh you want your consumers to buy your advertisers products and use their applications in which they pay you money in order to have the privilege to showcase these games.
So you get money from advertisers, you get money from these game companies, and god knows where else, (because I'm not privileged with the full knowledge of where else you get your billions or millions as the case may be), and now your consumers who have been used to receiving these free networking services abeit with the asformentioned commericial ads etc.; must now pay $14.99!
I have praise your services to the skies in my little blog, because of you I have reconnected with friends I haven't seen in years, I have met new friends because of you, but I will get there phone numbers and addresses if I have to and leave Facebook if I have to. Why? Because I can't afford $14.99 a month!
To tell the truth I can barely afford to pay for the internet services I have now. If god forbid I lose my job I can't see myself going though the rain, snow, heat, and travel exspenses to go to Facebook to use your services for the privilege of contacting my friends and family for $14.99 a month.
Now it's your turn to tell the truth. Don't reply back with a standard company response to my comments. Don't try to tell me that it's exspense in these hard economic times for you, President, Ceo's, and manegers of Facebook with billions of dollers at your command. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!
You must come up with another reason or solution to why you think 'we' the consumers must some how pay nearly 200 dollars a year. Something that I can believe in. Or else just don't do it. I don't belive you can because it just doesn't make sense.

That's it. That's my comment. Oh by the way I will be copying this comment and posting this in my little blog. So even though I may not have a lot of readers I just don't want this comment to be swallowed up in the mismer of comments that will get lost and forgotton by whom ever runs this page. I will be following up on this situation and also reporting it on my blog. Not much of a thing for a big internet company to worry about however you got to start somewhere. You did, in your college dorm with all your friends livin' off ramen noodles and pizza coming up with such a great idea for a networking service. Just think about that President of Facebook and others.

Sincerely,
Michelle Annette Rudd

Two Jumps ahead, and You Still Don't Get Me.

2010-01-14T18:24:00.000-08:00

I wrote this poem of mine on the fly and I was inspire by a talk I had with a friend of mine. I don't really know what it all means but the gist of it is about judgemental people. However you interpret it I think you'll enjoy it.

Run, run, run.
Go, go, go.
You have your life in order
and you think your better
than me.

Meanwhile back at the ranch,
I'm living life at the fullest.
You say I'm not and I'm
playing the fool but you
don't know me so more
fool you.

You look back and feel
satisfied. I look ahead
and ride, ride.
The future ahead of
me and you can only
see behind?

Are you really satisfied?

One jump ahead and you
still don't get me. Will you
believe that you still have
the power to upset me?

I know who I am, and where
I want to be. So why don't you
mind your business and just
let me be?

When you think your way ahead
of me, look down in front.
I'm the girl that's waving hi and
you just grunt.

I'm a fool, I'm an idiot, but with my
mistakes I'm ten time wiser than
you and I've got what it takes.
To survive, to thrive, to stay alive,
and while your feeling smug just
think of this; things stand the test
of time the longer it takes.

You wanna it done fast or do you
wanna it done right? My life is my
life, it's gonna be tight. So while
your two steps ahead and think
your perfect. I think you have
a lot to learn. Why don't you take
time to learn it?

Instead of judging me, criticising me,
and telling me I'm stupid take the
timber out of your eye and build
a house that's useful.

While your one step ahead of the game
while not knowing the rules and I'm
making the rules up as I go along.
Who's right? Who's wrong?

We'll find out later and don't be surprise
if you find me if I win this game of mine.

It aian't about you!

2010-01-01T23:21:00.000-08:00

I wrote this little poem after this guy by the bus stop tried to pick me up and my way to work. (He was cute and all but waaaaay to young for me!) In the end though he ended up trying to sell me he's RAP CD. Bought it of course but inspiration had to come from some where! Giggle!

It ain't about you!

By Clueuin A.k.a MAR

I put on lipstick and brush my hair. Spray on so much perfume I almost pollute the air. High heel boots, fat fur coats. So when I walk out the door, I look fierce.

But ba-by, here's the bad news....

It ain't about you!

Don't step to me feeling breezy.

It ain't that easy.

I ain't that easy!

What?

What?!

If I'm refreshing my make-up

it's not a invitation.

If I bend over to pick- up a

pencil, it's not a flirtation.

So don't step to me on the

train.

Are you insane?

Sorry son, I hate to break it to ya, (no I don't).

It ain't about you. Really.

If I'm feelin' you, I'll let you know.

You know?

Sometimes a girl just wants to look correct.

Sometimes it's all about Self-respect.

I mean where are you when I look a wreak?

So umm, don't come to me, step to me, with

a wack compliment/line. 'Cause if I need a

man, he's gotta stand the test of time.

'Cause sometimes ba-by.......

.....It ain't about you.

The last bit of Summer.

2009-08-08T13:20:00.000-07:00

O.k folks time to lighten up and think of most pleasanter things. After all our passed away loved ones would'nt want us to be all sad and morse forever. So here's a poem that I hope will lighten your mood as well as your hearts.

The Last Bit Of Summer.

Like the last squeeze of lemonade

should be savered.

Like a good piece of cake found

in the back of the fridge nice

and cool.

So the cold winter nights can

be bared as we look

back behind us.

To that last hot summer sun

and that cool green, green

grass at our backs.

That Last Bit of Summer.

Gone too soon

2009-07-20T06:14:00.000-07:00

This poem is for anyone who has lost a loved one in the Past or Present. But mostly it's my reaction to Micheal Jackson's Passing as well as all other celebrities we will miss. I hope this poem gives people,;no matter what they do for a living, comfort.

Gone Too Soon

By M.R (A.K.A Clueuin)

Sometimes you swear whenever you hear a door slam that it's,

them just coming in the door.

You hear a song and a tear rolls down. A heart pang then you

must go on.

No matter what your mind thinks, no matter how logical, you

just can't help feel that there could have been more time.

More time, more time, more time.

Your walking down the street and swear it him/her/she/he you saw

there.

At the record store or at the mall, or at the barber shop.

Then you shake your head as you lose your mind

your heart caught in your throat.

You sit yourself down at a park bench or chair and try to calm your mind

inside your saying; "Not Fair."

Not Fair, not fair, not fair.

It doesn't matter when they go.

You just wish it wasn't so.

If loved them or hated them

or just wish you could take

back those words you said.

Your always going to say

and feel that they were

gone to soon.

More Time, more time, more time.

Not Fair, not fair, not fair.

They were

Gone to Soon.

Spritual thoughts for St. Patrick's Day and beyond.

2009-03-10T11:18:00.000-07:00

Thank you for give me the Spirit.
By M.A.R (A.K.A Clueuin)

You might think that I'm ungrateful for the things you've given me.
You might think that I take for granted all the blessings you've bestow.
But Lord, Creator, forgive me Ma'am ?Sir but your wrong and the only way I can tell you so is in this poem song.

I wake up in the morning glad to have another day. Another day, another chance to change my life, to start anew.

Because of the Spirit you ave implanted in me at birth I can go on. I can go on despite the troubles that come down on me and the Problems that I face. You give me strength to try and achieve my goals. That is the most important thing that you have given to me.

Thank you for giving me the Spirit.
Everyday I'm near it. I feel your grace and your spirit keeps me safe and whole

I want you to understand that though you don't always verbally hear it. I thank you for the spirit.
For grace and power every day and how, how I do thank you now.

When a Loud Black Woman Speaks, (Or Ode to a loud Black Women.)

2009-01-20T14:46:00.000-08:00

When a Loud Black Woman Speaks, (Or Ode to a loud Black Women)
By M.A.R (A.K.A Clueuin)

I know that she seems uncouth

but you must admit the truth.

When a loud black woman speaks you

hear her.

What you learn from her lips though

you are ashamed to admit the wisdom

you can learn from her.

When a loud black Women Speaks.....

You don't as much see her coming as

You hear her coming.

Don't say you haven't been warned because

If she had told you once

She has told you twice.....

......."Don't you get me started!"

Yet do you obey and hear what she says?

No?

Then you haven't truly comprehended;

You have no understanding of the simplist of

concepts.

Some how you've lost command of your

Auditory Senses!

In other words......

Are you deaf!

When a loud black woman speaks.

My love affair with food- Poetry to feed the mind when you can't feed the belly.

2008-10-08T13:04:00.000-07:00

The food in front of me

by M.A.R (A.K.A Clueuin)

With all my soul I do enjoy the meager feast before my eyes.

In the privacy of my dinning table, I tucker in as much as I am able.

The food in front of me is my total focus. From the Green of the beans to the roasted chicken. The rice, the beans, the pork, the shrimp, I enjoy whatever is on my plate.

The smells I smell add to my senses of taste and sometime feel. The crisp of the skin on my fried chicken and the smush of the fries in my mouth. These feeling I feel are judged probably to emotional but think of this before your judge. When last you had a good meal eating your favorite thing in the world, did you give rhyme or thought or reason for the ecstasy in eyes you rolled; at some tasty tidbit that you were eating? Did you give a damn if you be judged?

The food in front of me is for eating, no matter what dietary issues I have. Whenever I'm hungry and have money for the spending, the food I eat is in my control.

And ahh the deserts, the snacks for repleting my fading feeling of being full. The cakes, the ice cream, the chocolate I'd be needing as I fill my mouth my sighs are uncontrolled. Then when it ends I'm full and contented. No matter how guilty I'm made to feel in the end. I've had my fill and satisfied I'm sleeping. To wake tomorrow to begin again.

The food in front of me.

Real Stavation

by M.A.R

I think I know when my belly rolls

and I feel as if I haven't eaten for days

that I know what true stravation is

but truth be known I have not a clue.

Real Stravation

is when stealing

becomes an option.

Real Starvation

is when torn

between paying

your mortgage

and feeding your

children, you choose

feeding your children

everytime!

Real Starvation is

when you think in months

instead of hours about

the last time you ate a

good meal. Hell the last

time you ate.

Real starvation is a mother

crying in the night at a dying

baby whom she couldn't feed

the day before.

Standing on line at the fast

food counter, mumbling

to yourself for the line to

move as you wait for your

Meal Combo is not.....

Real Starvation.

Sorry folks but those are the facts. But if your really starving here in this city are a list of food banks you can go to or contact:

http://www.worldhungeryear.org/nhc_data/nhc_02.asp

http://www.worldhungeryear.org/nhc_data/nhc_02.asp

With those two, you can type in your city and a list will appear that will give you address to these food organizations.

Good luck.

And for all others please donate to your local food bank. Some really starving people would appreciate it.

Peace,
Clueuin

Looking Forward to the Morning Light.

2008-10-01T13:37:00.000-07:00

Looking forward to the morning light.

By M.R (A.K.A Clueuin)

First day for the rest of my life.
Looking forward to the morning light.

First step was the hardest part.
Looking forward to the morning light.

First time in a long while that I've look
forward to a new day dawning.
First time I've understood Sting's song;
'Brand New Day".
First time I go to bed looking forward to
tomorrow and not think; 'why I'm I still
here.?'

Looking forward to the morning light,
stretching and yawning with a smile on
my face. The world is a wonderful place.
I hope it lasts, I hope it lasts.

Looking forward to the morning light.

(Wrote this because I think I've finally
triumph over the red tape over at a certain
place I can't name because I don't need people
judging me right now. But I hope this poem inspires
someone who's had too many bad days. C.U.I)

My Wellspring's Flow

2008-09-30T07:15:00.000-07:00

This Edifice So Strong
By M. R (A.K.A Clueuin)

I look upon this building with foundation so firm.
I ask myself will it stand?

This edifice so strong, standing tall. Forever rebuilding
Upon it’s foundation. Only time will tell if it will stand
the test of time.

The winds of time and change are so strong. Will this edifice
to love and strength stand firm or bend?
Firm like an unmoving mountain or Bend like a willow tree.
Can this edifice do both? Only time will tell.

This edifice so strong, stand tall. Forever rebuilding up it’s
Foundation. Will I find it still standing in the future?
Only time can tell.

This Edifice so Strong.

Oye,it's bright in here isn't it? Welcome to Clueuin's Art and Poetry Corner

2008-09-30T06:26:00.000-07:00

O.k I've finally decided to do it. After writing countless Blog Post about what's going on in Brooklyn and NYC; I've decided to place some of my poems on the World Wide Web!
So sit back, relax, (look over your shoulder to make sure the boss or instrutor isn't looking at you, and enjoy some Art and Poetry complements of Clueuin. And if you have the time check our Clueuin 411 at : wwwmrclueuinbrooklynrules.blogspot.com.
Oh and I made it a little bit brighter on this blog because all art should be enjoyed in the bright light of day. Don't you agree?

Peace,
Clueuin